The importance of "how are you?"

Based on purely the hypothetical, I realized today the importance of asking the very common question "how are you", especially when talking with a loved one on the phone.

The (hypothetical) situation: you call your wife as you're about to head home from the office and instead of kicking off the conversation with a pleasant how are you, you're into heavy stuff, scheduling, cooking etc. At the tail end of the unhealthy exchange, she says she's not feeling very well. Well don't you feel like a git. You could say "why didn't you tell me you weren't feeling very well" - but of course the volleys of blame could have been nicely avoided if you'd opened the conversation with a "how are you". Of course, both the question and the response need to be genuine and true.

Another (hypothetical) situation: your wife calls you as you're about to head home from the office and instead of her kicking off the conversation with a pleasant how are you, you're into heavy stuff, scheduling, cooking etc. At the tail end of the unhealthy exchange, you say you've had a crappy day and really tired. Well doesn't she feel like a female version of a git. Once again, the volleys of blame could have been nicely avoided if she'd opened the conversation with a "how are you". Of course, both the question and the response need to be genuine and true.

Please let me know if this rings true with you and more importantly if how are you is making a difference in your wife (sorry life).

Recent observations

Fashion ? Ok, I think I understand why some kids leave the tag on the baseball caps, but what are people thinking leaving the tag on their suit sleeve ? You know the tag I mean, the one that says the brand, perhaps size and colour info with those little annoying four corner stitches.

Charity ? Pulled up to a traffic light and saw a pan handler getting ready to ask for some cash with a sign that begins "so broke..."...he was messing with something in his pocket and around his neck. Sure enough as a pull closer, he's got a small MP3 player around his neck. What's wrong with this picture !

Obesity ? Trying not to be cruel here, but the cashier at the grocery store yesterday was a structural marvel. I actually think her arms were shorter than her width (not waist), width ! When a grocery item came to a stop on the conveyor belt she couldn't reach it - I almost LOL'ed (but that would have been cruel). But isn't the ability to reach the food on the conveyor belt part of the job requirement ? Weird clumps of fat filling out her sub 5' frame, her watch was actually buried into the folds of skin on her wrist. And not even a compensating cheery demeanor either. No hello, no thank you for shopping, no you're welcome. Rather gruff (but then again you probably can't blame her).

The ozone ? Dennis Miller recently observed - you know why we're depleting the ozone layer ? Because of the all the smokers that now have to smoke outside ! What's worse, a stinky office or global warming ?

Huff

The best TV I've ever seen (ok well maybe drama).

Huff Episode 13. Just got around to seeing it tonight. Why didn't anyone tell me how good it was or even get me watching this show years ago. Oh I forget, I'm in the only guy in our universe who watches it.

What a f***ing rollercoaster of a ride. Water works flowing nicely for at least 3 scenes. The whole spectrum of emotions and feelings - both mine and the characters - wrapped up into the final episode of the season (hold on, I hope this isn't the end of the whole series) Wow !

Looking it up online (weird that showtime in the US - sho.com doesn't allow non-US readers)...sounds like the show is cancelled. So only two series, what a absolute shame. My summary: interconnected story of group of highly dysfunctional, and primarily insane, family and friends, fall off the emotional rails in every conceivable way. Highly complex drama with magnificent acting. Amazingly, touches of humour and hope.

ps yes the expletive is called for (trust me)

That's how you do it

Although I'm not a big fan of the Italian football team, I really enjoyed seeing them play yesterday, with lots of creative play up front, smart passing and quality finishes. You could definitely tell they didn't want to go to penalties ! Sound familiar ?

Great win Italia, well deserved. Next up Semi number 2 - can Zidane keep it going. Vive France - World Cup fever is still here !

A valiant effort

A valiant effort by our Brit footballers, especially with a man down for most of the game. But everyone knows you can't win with just a great defense and England are notoriously crappy in penalty shoot-out situations. Credit to Portugal goalie Ricardo and some fabulous penalty kick saves.

Major disappointments by the big names, but great efforts by some newcomers and a great game from Canadian born Owen Hargreaves - happy Canada Day !

I guess I'll watch a little more of the tournament, albeit with far less enthusiasm.

Moving on.

Game day (quarter final)

Just over an hour to the England vs Portugal quarter final game...still foggy in the head after a date night last night downtown.

All English hopes are on the boys to pull through today, lots of questions, doubts and fears...

Is this the game for Rooney to break loose ? Can he keep his cool ?
How much will Portugal miss Deco and Ronaldo ?
How fit is Gary Neville?
Is there any chance we'll see the Walcott kid play ?
How many yellow and red cards today ?

...and will PJ's personal calendar get more complicated or fall into place ?

Which is the other (personal) melodramatic story developing here - my ever-changing business schedule and trying to: see the remaining games; focus on a critical customer project (one of about 5 at the moment); attend a technical conference in Halifax, Nova Scotia; and help the family prepare for my sister-in-law's wedding and entertaining out-of-town guests (staying in our "massive" house) within the next two weeks ! Two big problems - playing the odds with England's chances to advance with the fact the first (important) event of the Halifax conference happening at the exact same time as the WC final; delays with my customer suggest most of my on-site time is needed the week I'm supposed to be in Halifax and the week building up to the wedding (when I'd much rather prefer some golf time with my visiting brother-in-law).

Something's gotta give.

An hour to kickoff, gotta make breakies and a cuppa

ENG-GER-LAND

Really Keane

Sitting here (calmly) in little Italy waiting for doors to open for the Keane concert across the street. 'Zan within shouting distance in line (what a bastard I am). Getting my pizza to go...amazing, sneaked the pizza box through...

Here now, close, real close ! But waiting, waiting...


Fab show - fast, slow, fast, lots of anthem tracks, a good 'ole singalong.

Time (or maybe not)

Unfortunately, Mick's words are not on my side...

Finding time to write some thoughts and ideas on this blog is becoming increasingly difficult. I feel guilty just typing these few words tonight when so many other things of apparent higher priority are tugging on my time. Hold on mate, you say, PJ's always talking about movies, and sports and such. Where does he find the time to watch a two hour movie ?

So maybe time isn't really the problem. I admittingly (sp) do veg if front of the boob tube (hopefully to be a plasma one day) on a regular basis. However, for me, this is when I get to switch off, detach from the problems and pressures of the day. [Strangely enough, I seem to be drawn to the complex (and stressful) lives of fictional characters !] So I guess I scientifically do have the time to jam more into my life and write more in this blog. But in the words of Mr. Bush, it's hard. I think I have a max of say 14 hours of brain power a day. Taking an average of about 7 1/2 hours of beauty sleep, that leaves 2 1/2 hours of the day that I think I need to just shut off for a while. So watching sports, TV or movies during evenings of the work week fits very conveniently, thank you very much. BUT, what about all the other stuff that's not getting done and any additional evening work load that eats into that down time and inevitably creates some undue pressure, crankiness and drags out whatever energy I have in reserve. I make it a pretty strong rule, that I don't do work on weekends. That slips now and again, but typically I have a few evenings a week when I'm doing work work. All that other stuff, personal finances, housework...maybe that's all...so why am I complaining ? I've got lots of time to take for myself !

There are other activities that are good for the non-brainy time of the day. E.g., doing the dishes, low stress, a resulting sense of accomplishment, getting spousal points, and you can watch TV (mind you, really mindless TV) at the same time !! Same can be said for yard work, cleaning bathrooms (with the stereo blasting of course) and talking with your wife.

Which brings us to some trouble areas. Times of the day (or weekend) when your (or maybe just my) brain is really begging for a little R&R and you're committed to a brain intensive activity, like say, making lumber calculations for the latest outdoor project or doing your taxes, or helping your so with his creative science project. Or even the situation when really important things plague and pollute your waking thoughts ! This is when things can go wrong, tempers flair, headaches settle in, hammers hit thumbs instead of nails and you get crappy night's sleep.

Not sure what to make of this analysis, is it just me ? Maybe I need to cut back, somewhere ? Gotta get to those 989 emails in my inbox that need sorting (btw best sorting technique I've found so far, file based on sender first, then by subject).

Getting exciting

Toronto and imported loves (and hates)

Thanks to Mom for finding this recent article in the Globe and Mail. Interesting writing on the topic of the ever-growing number of world cup inspired flags in this fine city of ours and the unfortunate nastier side of homeland baggage. Hope this link to the article "Bending over backward" works as one path I tried to the article asked me to register ( I googled "Bending over backward" and followed the link from there).

Stop the world (for 8 hours at least)

First, apologies for the lapse on bloggage.

Second, what got me to finally get back to the personal keyboard ?..a decent movie of course. Lord of War was recommended by my brother quite a while ago and I just watched it tonight. I can't really say it was a great movie, because of the feeling it left with me. Don't want to spoil it here, but maybe I can disguise my thoughts this way...the movie points to an complex part of how the world works today, one that I can understand exists and why it exists. Something I and most accept, but shouldn't. One that appears just to complex to unravel and make right.

So, I'm not in the cheeriest of moods (especially if I wander to thoughts on a global scale). There is something to be said for narrowing your focus and trying to deal with things on a more local level, worry about things that you can more directly effect or influence (like, let me think, your child's education !).

And I'll leave off there, because there's a few hundred things piling into my world at the moment and I know I could go on for hours tonight, but another jam packed day awaits in 6 hours.

Yes, there's lot's to talk about, sports, terrorism, time management and family - if only the world would stop for, say 8 hours now and again. Enough time to do a personal priority check up, look around and try and glimpse what's really happening to our world and of course, tell other people about your views, ideas and dreams.

Goodnight and have a pleasant tomorrow.

Getting in the mood...

Clear out those dirty thoughts...

I'm talking about The World Cup of course.

I'm sure there will be lots of posting and comments over the next few months about football, and if you look back to the beginning of this blog, you'll see that posting number 3 perhaps gave you a sense of how serious us Brits take footy.

With only 13 days and 21 hours to go, what better way (for England fans of course) to get in the mood than to have a peek at these Eng-Ger-Land videos at http://uk.launch.yahoo.com/world-cup-2006/ (I think they work best with Internet Explorer). Special thanks to my converted England-fan wife for tracking these down - of course, her favourite is the Embrace track (which is the official one - "a little slow, but bloody good").

I must warn those readers that aren't truly appreciative of the football world - some of these are a little dodgy, but you can't complain about the creativity and clever lyrics.

Nice new snazzy kits eh lads ! Everyone fork over another 60 quid ! Pic at the top is from the World Cup site and is from yesterday's pre-tournament friendly loss to Belarus (no worry lads, just testing out some of the newer players!).

The Visitor

Is it just me ? Am I that much of a socialite ? Maybe I just prefer the company of others over my own.

You may know that I like to play the host - in my home and in my city. So I'm often puzzled/peeved with friends when I'm visiting their city and they don't seem to be keen on getting together.

I hope I don't offend a few readers here, but tonight is a good example. I think that I'd mentioned to quite a few *friends in Ottawa that I'd be in their fine city this week. But I find myself dining alone this evening. Don't get me wrong, I like the opportunity to go solo away from home on occasion. Tonight, I must say I'm a little disappointed (although it gives me an opportunity to write this blog post, and the food and service here at Empire Grill never disappoints). Can't be too hard on the Ottawa folks because I tried to connect with a few visiting Brits tonight as well - not sure if they were avoiding an ex-pat or I fell victim to transatlantic communication blues.

*work friends, that is. I sometimes feel like I'm being a real prat trying to drag them away from their families for a drink or dinner. Perhaps I'm overstepping that "work friend" line a little with people who I consider friends (having spent many hours talking about a vast array of topics and of course sharing a lotta laughs and a few drinks), but maybe I'm more of a work colleague/acquaintance to them.

But, give my US colleagues a lot of cred here, turns they returned the call almost immediately. Feel a little bit of a urban snob though, but didn't feel like hanging out in the West end !

Live updates...US colleague puts out dinner invite for tomorrow; Brit lad returns email (comm probs). When it comes down to it, I guess I just like to be the centre on attention ! Wounded ego signing off.

Endnote: although this latest experience relates to the potential tenuous relationship one has with work friends or ex colleagues, I feel pretty bold here, so I feel I can extend this feeling to "other types of friends" !

Making plans

A friend of mine said an interesting thing yesterday (he admitted today, that he heard it from someone else, and perhaps you've heard it before).

When you make plans, God laughs at you.

It goes against most modern, organized thinking, but quite likely, is the real story for the unpredictable screenplay of life. Personally, I find this thought quite difficult to absorb as I am quite a detailed person and do quite a lot of planning - what does it mean, throw it all out of the window - and "just go with the flow" ? No, you can't just leave it all up to chance, but it probably means there's a limited return on making plans any more than 3 weeks out. But, it doesn't mean you can slack off either. To survive and thrive in this world, you've gotta be on your toes and be ready for the opportunity when you see it (kind of a soccer analogy).

What happens when you're faced with an unpredictable situation, a surprise guest or a golden opportunity ? You hope that this is where your instinctive nature kicks in and you adapt to the situation and it turns out just great ! The funny thing is that you don't get to enjoy the buildup, the anticipation of it all.

Vacations are a good example, lots of planning and anticipation (actually this is sometimes the best part), but the actual vacation doesn't live up to expectations or most often, is quickly forgotten. And sometimes, things just don't go as planned. However, sometimes the way it turns out becomes a long lasting story that is retold over and over with old friends, remember the time...

Of course, not all surprises are good and it is often these unpleasant surprises that are the real tests in our lives. We definitely can't plan for these events (nor do we want to), so all we can do is be prepared (there's a difference, I think) and get on with it.

So, some advice for the day, put down the daytimer, connect with a buddy that has the spirit of spontaneity or even take a cue from your kids (they are great non-planners) and take a ride someplace new, consider an unusual recommendation, take the time to look at something new, call the person who just sent you that last email or accept the invite. I'm sure it will be memorable and you'll have a story to tell.

So I'm sitting here in a hotel bar in Ottawa, making plans for the evening...what ? Gotta go and see what happens next !

Spontaneously written by PJMixer.

No soup for you !

Hopefully this very famous line rings a bell with the majority of you.

It's from one of the best Seinfeld episodes ever - The Soup Nazi. Although I don't think the real Soup Man approves of the episode title, the fact is the soup is fantastic.

I'm just finishing a bowl of the Tomato Wild Rice here at my office. My office happens to be attached to the Eaton Centre here in Toronto and the debut location for The Original SoupMan in Canada.

I had my doubts, had good could soup really be ? Well, let me tell you, it's good enough to write about ! It's not just soup, it's a meal, full of rich flavours, every bite is a joy, you don't want to get to the bottom of the bowl and you can't wait to sample the next one on the menu. I'm not kidding folks ! I had he Beef Barley last week and I'm still talking about it to my wife !

A little costly perhaps, but worth every penny, classy establishment for saying it's situated in the food court. I talked to the proprietor this afternoon, and the deal is this. The soups are made in Indianapolis, then shipped to Canada. All international food import rules taken care of. Soup Man downstairs simply reheats the soup and serves from the cauldrons on display. Delivered in a number of sizes (including a litre container I can take home for some lucky guests soon), with fresh bread, fruit and a little chocolate bar. Perfection !

Who said Torontonians can't take a joke

Thanks to my very thoughtful brother-in-law for these funnies. Oh, did I mention he lives in Manitoba, last time I checked, I didn't think they had an NHL team !

The the lonely writer & the silent observer

I heard from a few friends recently who say they read this blog quite often. It's great to know someone is reading this stuff, but it would always be nice to get a little more feedback. It's a odd feeling you get doing a blog thing - the lonely writer ! Sometimes I think I am the only guys that thinks the stuff, or am I only one who is crazy enough to write it down. But maybe it fits my style well - the one way monologue rather than the challenged conversation ! Perhaps that's why people write books or lyrics or magazine articles - no chance for immediate rebuttal !

Perhaps this is just the latest way I can fuel my (bad) habit for quick commentary. I should just let it flow sometimes (with some warning) and resist the urge to edit and euphemize (I think that's the verb of euphemism - good info here on that juicy word). With the personal and occasional iffy topic, I'm sure that I could get myself into a lot of trouble - but it would probably spur some potent reader comments !

Anyway, food for thought.

When universes collide

Techies only.

You know that really annoying interference noise you get from Blackberrys these days - it usually occurs when data or voice traffic is coming to or from the device, and the device is close to some kind of speaker...

well, get this...

I actually heard it this evening when an ice cream truck drove by !

I'm pretty sure of the sound being blasted by its roof mounted speakers and now must deduct that the local ice cream man has a Blackberry.

Friends

Well you definitely pick your friends. And some people are much better at it than others. I must say that I think I'm pretty good a picking friends (and I can hear my mum saying in the background, the same was said by old headmaster from my early school years). Yes, that a compliment to you !

The difference to family is that the thing that bring friends initially together is a common interest. However, if that interest changes over time, it could spell the end for a friendship. Or, the relationship that friends build becomes more important than the past common interest. You just know each other too well, you can help each other out through the tough times and share an inside story every time you get together.

It's quite amazing really, that unrelated individuals, roaming around this big old world of ours, one day bump into one another and quickly recognize a connection. Like Meg says in Sleepless in Seattle, "it's like magic" (but not the kind we think of about love, but a magical feeling you perhaps get that you're not alone with your dreams, your passions, your humour, you've just found someone specifically designed to appreciate them).

Ok, I may been over dramatizing this a little, and of course not all friends are equal and friendships grow and often change over time, but like family, that feeling of comfort and being able to be yourself around true is a always something to cherish.

Friends. Those special people in your life who share, and understand, your highs and lows.

I can't leave this topic without of course touching on a favourite line from a favourite film "What I'm saying is - and this is not a come-on in any way, shape or form - is that men and women can't be friends because the sex part always gets in the way."

Yes, friends change over the years, but without them along the way, great memories would so easily fade and our lives would feel so empty. Isn't one of the greatest gifts we can give and receive is friendship. Friendships are so fragile and unpredictable, but perhaps that's what makes them special.

And what could be more special, than when family become friends and friends become family.

Photo from the M.I.L.K. Collection - www.milkphotos.com

Family

Well, that's a big very big topic. But it was suggested by a regular reader earlier today, so I'm just about in the right frame of mind to try and make sense of it...so, let's give it a go [but first a change of music - some mellow electronica].

As they say, you don't pick your family. In-laws ? Well, you kind of pick them ! From Hollywood influence and advice from friends, I think most people have caught on to this one. Have a good look at your spouse's family before you make the commitment. It's true,we are just like our parents ! And looking now to myself and my family, it really is true.

Some of you know my parents and some of you know my in-laws. They are not only close at heart, but are truly part of everything in my life today. Wow, that's a pretty big statement, maybe I should have written it in caps ?

This is probably a start of a very long posting about family, but I'm trying to tackle the essence...

I'm beginning to dislike a habit I have of writing on this blog based on inspirations from film, however it probably fits here. I watched a movie last night that twisted on the family connection quite well. It boiled down almost to a spiritual level - the bond of parent to child (well actually, mother to child, but I'm extrapolating here).

So, let me try and wrap my arms around this...

Family. An intense experience with and feeling for people you share intimate connections with, but who are often so different, if you had the disconnected opportunity, people you'd never become friends with.

Think back to your early twenties. A time when most of us were carefree, without spouses and children, who were the people most close to us ? Our friends.

Then...things change. We begin families of our own and we begin to see (again) the importance of family. The extended family becomes an extremely important relationship in our lives and we teach the value of family to our children.

Family will always be there. Good and bad. Hopefully for most of us, good. The connections we share with blood relatives and the extended family do not really falter on differences of opinion or priorities, they last, through thick and thin. They have to, otherwise there are only the people you bump into through life's journey, at school, at work, at the bar. Those relationships seem so fragile and unpredictable compared to that of family.

It takes a pretty serious argument to sever connections with family members, think of how many friendships could withstand the same arguments you've had with family !

Ok, I've rambled long enough. I'm not sure if any of that made sense. Hopefully a few things connected. However my habit of trying to make sweeping grand statements may have pissed off a few friends. Sorry, that's just how I feel right now.

G'nite.

Photo from the M.I.L.K. Collection - www.milkphotos.com

Keep coming back to the music

All it takes is a little existential observation to see your true passion.

Back here at the keyboard, trying to come up with some deep insights into life...but before the brain synapses start connecting (for me) I need a little music to background the moment.

This is when you think you're some kind of junkie, not of some illegal chemical (or natural) substance, but of your passion. The Music.

I'm happy here. Sitting here, composing some rambling monologue about nothing up to this point, as long as I've got some music groovin' in the background. Pause...need a beer refill...

[just popped downstairs for the rePhil and 'Zan is excited about some change in plot on Survivor, "it's going to change", she says, I say "is it going to have a better soundtrack ?"]

Back to the moment. Matisyahu is playing right now, you couldn't imagine a more weird mix - orthodox Jewish reggae / dancehall singer...

So, I've watched some decent movies over the last week or so, but I'm finding movies still don't hold up to repetition (for me). And for me, if I can predictably reproduce "the moment", I'm a happy guy. Movies are a great catalyst for "the moment" or "the mood", but they rarely don't work a second time around. Music, well, that's a completely different story.

And it's not just 'cuz it's an audio experience rather than a visual, 'cuz I can watch a musical performance over and over ! I never get tired of a great U2 song replayed from the fantastic concert DVDs they produce, or sitting back and absorbing a Diana Krall performance, nor can I wait for the DVD of the Coldplay concert from the Toronto appearances last month, and that's why I didn't hesitate picking up the Gorillaz Demon Days live DVD at HMV on the way home tonight.

So, I'm still here listening now to UB40 (keeping with the reggae genre), wondering where to go from here...and I'm beached, for now...

Checkpoint

First, thanks for the all the positive comments and encouragement from friends and family. I'm really pleased with the amount of readers I'm getting. Don't be shy - post a comment if you find a posting is really interesting or you enjoy a band or movie recommendation !

Next, apologies for the lack of posting of late. However, you'll be happy to know I've got quite a lot of ideas for future postings written down, so it's just finding the time (and focus) to publish them (with the right amount of depth).

Here are some of the ideas I have, call it a preview for an upcoming release...

People don't change - however habits can be changed in 21 days !
Charity - who comes first ?
Synchronicity
The trouble with books

And of course, all the usual topics, including thought provoking movies, music finds, sports and funny observations.

Hope you'll stay tuned.

p.s. And for the keen readers and technos out there, if you get a little tired of coming here and seeing nothing new, a reminder from many postings ago that there are a number of services that you can use to notify you when a web site changes. The one I use is ChangeNotes.com.

More gearhead stuff

As a follow up (boy that sounds like about 50% of my business email) to an earlier posting re: cars where I showed the pic of the beautiful Audio race car...this article in the Post today was another story about Audi's world leading automobile (racing) technology - The "R10's 5.5-litre, twin-turbo V12 diesel pushes more than 650 horsepower and 812 pound-feet of torque".

Time to grab a diesel ?

The Art of Noise

Dad just forwarded this beauty...

The New Honda Civic Ad, incl. even better making of mini-documentary.

Thanks for being such a good surfer Dad. Just think how much other cool stuff you'll find when you really have some free time when you retire. We've got to think of some new title, like... Collaborative Virtual Enjoyment Catalyst.

An early morning photo blog

Grab a coffee. Good morning.

Sideways friends

It's the weekend, time for movie inspired deep reflection...I won't go on too much right now, let's just say that Sideways is a great, great movie and even better when enjoyed with a decent bottle of wine by your side. The best thing about this movie (watching now for the second time) is that it really made me think a lot about my good friends.

Thinking of you all.

Happy Birthday T.O.

Happy Birthday to Toronto, 172 years old today.

An excerpt from A Very Short History of Toronto...

...in the 17th century, indigenous peoples opened trade with the French, who subsequently established trading posts in the area in the 18th century. [The community] passed to British control in 1763, and the creation of an urban community began 30 years later when colonial officials built Fort York and laid out a town site. That community, "York", became the capital of the province of Upper Canada (now Ontario). It also grew as an important commercial centre, and, in 1834, with 9,250 residents, it was incorporated as the "City of Toronto".

Hope to see in our fantastic city soon.

I'd like to thank...

Reporting on the Academy awards the morning after, movie fan - PJMixer...

I'd like to thank...Mom and Dad for introducing me to the music of Johnny Cash when I was young...otherwise I wouldn't have been interested in seeing Walk the Line (fab movie, too bad Joaquin was competing against Philip). And there again, is the connection to all things music in my life.

Of all the nominated movies I didn't see this year, I did manage to see 4 of the big award winners - Reese; Philip; Rachel and Crash. Can I pick 'em or what.

Biggest surprise - Reese. Best speech - Clooney. Most deserved - Philip (great performance, great career roles, although I wasn't a big fan of Capote) and Crash (everyone I know loved this one, best movie I've seen in a long time, gotta see it again now).

I heard Syriana was a great movie, so I'll give a nod to Clooney. But Brokeback Mountain ? I actually don't know anyone that's seen it !

For car lovers

I'm beginning to consider car options for later this year as my current lease on my Passat Wagon expires in November (after all, isn't half the joy of the big purchase the research).

I took the kids to the auto show a few weeks ago and started to do a little research online. I often take a browse through the Driving section of the National Post on Fridays and I came across this article about VW's Direct Shift Gearbox that is in the new Audio A3 3.2. Luckily this little gem is too small to consider as our replacement family car, so I'm not seriously tempted (just keep your fingers crossed that my old Mazda keeps running and I'm not made to make the decision on whether I really need a second car).

Don't get me wrong, I'm still a big fan of using public transport whenever appropriate, and I'm a happy man when I take the subway to work most days, but the need to drive on a more regular basis would really tighten the justification screws for some leading edge German engineering.

As you may know cars are in my blood, with my Dad being a huge car nut. He's proud to have been in the industry for 50 years and is about to formally retire at the end of this month. Thanks Dad for giving me the appreciation for: the beauty of the body curve; a handbrake turn (which is a cinch in an icy parking lot - very popular the kids in the backseat - maybe they're also getting the bug); double clutching and heel-and-toe (which I still can't do); Formula 1; and the excitement of seeing a new model for the first time on the street - what was "that" ?

If you're interested my shortlist for a replacement this year is:

Mazda6 Sport Wagon
Subaru Legacy/Outback Wagons
Volvo V50
VW Passat Wagon

Plus perhaps a few more interesting choices if I consider a used vehicle !

My buddy DK at work is also in the market for a new car this year, and he keeps asking what he should buy - and with his budget it may be exciting to do a few test drives for him !

Do you know what it means to miss New Orleans

I miss her.

But I've heard she's coming back.

Without deliberately focusing on her, she's come up quite a few times this week and is in my mind now. I don't think it's a coincidence that it's Mardi Gras, I glimpsed a few shots of bourbon Street earlier this week and it appears 'Nawlins is back.

Unfortunately I've never been to New Orleans for the big party, but I have great memories of my three visits there. Actually, I almost lost faith in her last time, right up to the last night, when I went for one last lap and sat down to listen to a jazz band, talk to the musicians and reconnect with everything I love about her. That wiped out all the unflattering images of this dirty town and some of the bad memories of the "worst hangover of my life".

With no real planned theme for tonight's dinner, I reached for a New Orleans cookbook my brother bought me a while ago and decided on Trout Meuniere Amandine. That of course set off the theme and the sound of Harry Connick Jr. (singing the title of this post) is still lingering in the background.

I'm not sure what it is about New Orleans, of even the feeling you get in the south. It can be one of laissez faire and it comes as a pleasant surprise if you travel there. Even a cab ride from the airport will reveal a slower pace of life than what meets the eye on TV America. You get a genuine feeling that people value the simpler things in life. There are of course exceptions, but the average Joe (or Jenny) in New Orleans seems like the real McCoy. And I've got to thank my Bro again for a couple of things: introducing us to some very fine Southern folk, especially my sister-in-law CS and her wonderful family; and tainting my music collection with an odd alt/country track here and there.

Unfortunately, don't think I can close here, without giving you a pointer to the latest embarassing Bush moment (AP video, MS Internet explorer probably needed) on the Katrina cock-up.

Gotta grab a bourbon and put on Wild at Heart, but first, where's that Iko Iko song ?

If you're still looking to help New Orleans out, The American Red Cross is probably a good charity to donate to.

p.s. Yes, Mom - we had pancakes on "Fat Tuesday" (Shrove Tuesday)

What a Flügellauf !

Maybe it's the time of day, but I thought this was funny in the Guardian Unlimited !

"Off" sick, poor old me !

Well in this world of "always-on", how can one actually be "off" ? The emails keep flying and the mobile phone keeps ringing.

I've got one of those head hurting, can't think straight, low energy, drippy and coughy cold / flu things. Although Mom, in her traditional ways, would say I can't have the flew if I'm not in the hospital !

I've been taking a lethal combination of cold/flu/cough day/night drugs and the occasional ibuprofin, Fisherman's Friend and cough syrup, mixed with unavoidable warm drink caffeine. The drug store visit was quite an ordeal, faced with the myriad of choices, in my state, how can I really distinguish between post-nasal drip, sinus pain or simple cold symptoms - just make it go away - I feel like crap ! Oh, but make sure it doesn't make me fall asleep in front of the computer, or worse, driving the car !

What makes it worse, is that annoying call you have with a person that almost sympathizes with you, but says "I've got the flu too - only got an hour sleep last night" - B***SH**, they sound so frigging cheery you'd swear they'd just won the lottery, no way could they be feeling this bad !

Oh, and of course this week just happened to be the date for my annual checkup with my doctor. Lucky me. Of course, she thinks I've got something a lot worse than the flu, which she is trying to prove with a saliva sample from deep in my throat - definite gag reflex - I thought I was going to throw up right in her face ! Not to mention the...

Prevention ? You ask - well, no I didn't get a flu shot back last fall. But I'm not sure that would have helped against the emotional and environmental stress of building a back yard ice rink in -15c weather last weekend ! Maybe my work buddy (and TTC newbie DK) has the right approach - wearing gloves on the subway ! Prevention - how about not going near your germ carrying kids when they come home from school (bless their little hearts) !

I've actually had a fair share of customer meetings this week. And each one has that awkward moment - should I pass on my germs via a business appropriate hearty handshake or be a wimpy, polite guy and mention my sorry state ! Then you have a little time with a colleague when you finally have the time to ask all the important questions you've been saving up for months and he's rambling on with all this great insight into the industry and technology - but your head is just about ready to explode. Then you decide, hey, before I go home, get a few winks perhaps, and prepare for the onslaught of the weekend - I might as well post my to my blog...and here I am.

Wish me luck shaking this one soon so I can enjoy the weekend. I've just got to get past a kids concert at school and maybe an adventurous outing to see my ultimate buddies open their movie Metal: A Headbanger's Journey tonight, sounds like that'll cure it !

OPB

No, not that "company" that SEH and I started many years ago.
No, not that old rap song.

Other Peoples Blogs

Mark Evans is a friend of mine who just happens to be a highly credible news and commentary source for the telecommunication industry. Mark writes for the National Post and his blog usually contains very serious content regarding the industry. However, Monday Jan 16th's entry provided a link to Rick Mercer's latest take on RIM with this spoof-ad, funny stuff, thanks for the link Mark.

Stvhrst is another friend that started a blog way before mine. However he definitely needs a little friendly push to increase the editorial comment a bit !

A VC is a new one that Mark just recommended, a nice blend of new tech, NYC, US politics and most importantly, music recommendations.

There are of course lots of corporate blogs, some which end up being a PR nightmare, while others can perhaps show a corporation's more personal side, like my fellow colleagues at Entrust - Sue and Chris.

The list of blogs is endless and constantly growing (well over 60M), so while I've been writing this entry I've wasted away quite a few precious minutes looking for some other cool blogs, but it's time a made dinner for the kids. I'll leave you with a sports one for the motor car racing [said with a Jackie Stewart accent] fan, especially with the new season close by - FastMachines.

What's a Googlewhack ?

I just tripped across this one again (I don't remember exactly what the trigger neuron was!) - this story always brings a smile to my face.

First, a googlewhack is what happens when two words are entered into Google (with no quotes) and it comes back with one and only one hit. Simple right, no !

I think I've told some of you about this before, but we went to see Dave Gorman's Googlewhack Adventure last summer. What a fabulously funny, TRUE story.

If you ever get a chance to see this show, get your hands on the DVD or read the book - go for it, I'm sure you won't be disappointed.

If you're in the mood to burn away a few minutes (hours), give it a try. You can get a one hit result pretty quickly, however the real trick is finding a real web site, not just an obscure link (like what you get when you enter something daft like "wonderously bizarros"). Note that many/all of the googlewhacks at googlewhack are probably no longer googlewhacks !

One Passion - Two Monkeys

[It does sound like a porn movie title doesn't it !]

I was thinking recently about what my real passion is in life...it didn't take too long, although I had to determine why some of my other interests weren't passions.

Music.

Adding two new music related recommendations for January:

Artic Monkeys - latest cocky young lads from England. Their first hit didn't get me too excited, but they just released their first album Whatever People Say I Am, That's What I'm Not and the tracks are really growing on me...download recommendation: Dancing Shoes. Latest single peaked at number two on the whacky UK charts last week.

Love Monkey - new show on CBS with Tom Cavanagh (from Ed fame). For me, the setting of the indy record business is very cool, with funky group of characters, a hot babe, great song samples, and some new artist "finds".

Can you have more than one passion ?

I'm hoping I can post a regular music recommendation per month.

Hanging out with J.Lo

Well, not quite. But it got your attention.

Big shout out to my big party work friends (especially, SM, TB, DK, KH, ML, GM and PB) who made the late night events of this week a lot of fun.

Summary: Downtown Miami, not so nice; South Beach, a great way to spend a hell of a lot of money; weather: not fab, but a lot better than here; music - could do with a good dose of fab Brit tuneology.

Note that the party events of the week were paid in full by massive amounts of Powerpoint exposure starting at 8am, mind numbing rah-rahs from a Tony Robbins motivation speaker protege, Armageddon talk from guest speaker Wesley Clark (although I actually did like his talk), constant Blackberry interruptions and customer "emergencies" and being away from my family for 6 days.

Other pluses for the trip were the real animals of Florida (gators in the Everglades National Park and dolphins in the harbour), and of course the golf (see previous post).

For those heading to South Beach with unlimited wads of cash, these hotel style hot spots are a must: The Shore Club and Hotel Victor, and Nikki Beach would have been pretty cool if our company hadn't rented it out for the (earlier part of the) evening.

Golf in January

I was lucky enough to be on business this week in Miami, and even more lucky that my wife was ok with me going down early to play a little golf. Turns out the planets were aligned and I shot my best round ever last Sunday. I'm proud of the score because I've finally broken 100, but don't get me wrong, I'm still a little embarrassed it's taken about 30 years. We had a late tee off (for this time of year) so the last couple of holes was an interesting exercise is ball hunting, with a hero par on the island green 18th in the dark. I managed to score a 96 (51 out, 45 in, 7 pars, a-blow-up-9 and a bunch 'o doubles or worse). Course: Hillcrest.

Faith once again in the great game.

Fun videos - time well wasted

WARNING - watching the following videos and getting caught up in the likely hunt for others will likely chew up a good portion of your time. If you've got a new baby crying in the background or about to pick up your kids at school or on a short coffee break at the office, you may think twice at watching them now.

Faves:

1. "torn"
2. A music video showing a new "sport" called Parkour. (Thanks SEH for finding this one and the GPRIME site that lots of other gems).
3. Honda ad

And for the sports fans (many from YouTube):

• Super soccer dribbles
• "Magic" soccer practice
• Table tennis
• Wicked foosball shot
• Hockey shot (a few folks have sent me this one)
  

A few for the those with a more "unusual" sense of humour:

• Napoleon Dynamite Top Ten tee shirt
• Ice scraping
• Old folks
• Haloween

Music vids:

• If you're looking to see what the voice looks like, there's a massive collection of free videos at Yahoo's uk music site
• But you won't find this one...Skinny Puppy - Pro-test (thanks SR for finding this one, BTW - the old link was broken)
  

Don't blame me, I warned you.

Politics - the topic had to come up sooner or later

I don't plan on writing a lot about politics on this blog for a number of reasons:

• I'm not an expert on (nor even really understand) our political process or system
• Most of the time, it's boring - old blokes firing argumentative comments based on party lines
• Most of you probably think it's boring, and I think there are other topics that are much more entertaining for the blog
  
• It's depressing, having to accept the fact that you've got a bunch of untrustworthy, immoral men running your country

All that being said, you do find some good comic relief now and again, and often with politics other than your own. In my case - US politics - now that is entertaining ! Especially as reported by Jon Stewart (not sure if your saw the news, but Stewart will be hosting the Oscars this year - should be fun !).

However, it's election time here in Canada and it's hard to escape political news, so much so, that even my 9 year old son was watching an "informal" interview with Prime Minister Paul Martin this morning on Canada AM.

I was rather disappointed with the interview, for some reason I had thought that we may see a different side to the PM or perhaps more substance. But alas, no. Same old story. But one fundamental thing struck me this morning.

During the build up to a federal election, aren't the party leaders supposed to be in high gear "selling" themselves as the best choice for the new PM ? These guys are fighting for their lives. Well, although I'm not an expert on politics, I do know a thing or two about selling and one big rule is as follows:

Objection handling - when the person asks a question, treat it as an objection. Handle it precisely and quickly. Make sure that after your response, the person has understood you, perhaps by saying "did I answer your question?"

This is one of the things that is really getting to me, most of these candidates never answer the blessed question. It's pointless, you just hear the same ranting and raving every day, sticking to their agenda. I think these guys are quite intelligent, so I'm reasonably sure they hear the question, but in their heads, the question is basically a trigger to a pre-written diatribe . Perhaps it's too risky to actually answer the real question, or perhaps it's just how politics work. I'm pretty sure they know the answer, but are second guessing that the public won't like it. Don't they know that if they don't properly answer a question, it lingers in the minds of all watching - what is he hiding ? Doesn't he care ? Isn't he listening to my needs and concerns ? I don't like it and I think the public deserves better. Wouldn't some genuine sincerity be refreshing, but would the public notice it ? Sometimes, the politician is so left field, that they even forget what the question was. This almost happened this morning, when a lady who had sadly lost her son recently to a gun death was asking the PM about gun control etc...off he went on auto-pilot and then (luckily for him) at the very end..."um, ah, blah and blah, I am sorry for your loss".

What we have here in Canada is a common problem. Two parties that are fighting it out and a few other also-rans. In a few weeks time we are basically voting for the lesser of two evils. Back to this morning's interview, I thought to myself, I'm hearing all this bullsh, what does some other intelligent person think ? So I asked my 9 year old son "what do you think of PM Paul Martin". The first two, auto, non-thinking, replies didn't surprise me, "good" and "he makes good rules", but the third threw me a bit or a curve ball. My son actually said "safe". This was a very quick response after listening quite intently, so I take it as genuine. I think the topic at the time was something about western Canadian alienation, so my son's comment probably wasn't about the content, I can only imagine it came from a deeper, subconscious place. "Safe". I guess he does come across rather fatherly and in command. I don't think I can say that about Mr. Harper.

On US politics during their last election I read something that I found very interesting (unfortunately I can't find a reprint or web source, but it went something like this...).
If you take political parties out of the equation and put the high priority fundamental issues of the day (foreign affairs, social welfare, military spending, same sex marriages) on a voting form, the large majority of Americans would vote the same way. Meaning there perhaps isn't polar opposite opinions dividing the population. What I take away from this is that when it comes down to it, most people want similar things from their government, priorities may be a little different, but one leader isn't going to be that different to another on major topics during the same period of time (pretty bold statement eh?). Would Kerry have gotten the US into Iraq ? Were the majority of the population in favour of this war ?

So, wrapping up, do I simply put my faith in the local MP to represent my views in Ottawa ? After all, that would appear the most effective way for me to have my issues heard and perhaps properly represented. Do I shun the process altogether and blame everyone else on the result the next day ? Or do I try and alter the course of Canada's future be trying to read between the tight lines of the promises being made by the party leaders ?

Happy voting, and don't forget about poor Jack.

Lessons learned

This is perhaps a good topic for the beginning of a new year.

I think a lesson learned could be as "simple" as a golf lesson (keep your head down, bum out, reach back and follow through) or as complex as learning to stay out of "certain" arguments with your wife. All have serious consequences if you forget what you've learnt (2 stroke and silence penalties).

3 of us in the family took golf lessons last year and I think we'll be continuing with more this year. My son has been taking lessons for quite a few seasons and most would agree, it shows. It was the first time I had taken a golf lesson and I truly think it's going to have a positive impact on my game, however, it'll take a little time. I think I've gone from the typical beginner hook to the hopefully more easily cured, slice. The family have been loyal students of Gary Kent for quite a years now.

Lessons do not have to be of the formal kind, just think of anything where, from experience, you know what the right thing to do is. If it's important enough (usually defined by the cost of a mistake) then learn it. How you learn it ? Well that's another topic. One method a good friend of mine (SEH) used to do was re-write all his study notes when preparing for an exam. He said that he always remembered the material better if he wrote it down, rather than just reading it. Perhaps actually writing this blog is helping me learn some new things !

I truly believe that if you can get that lesson learned (or is that learnt ?) to become a habit then you have success. You don't have to really think about it anymore, it's a habit, it feels natural, it feels weird if you don't do it. Most people say that good habits take a lot of repetition, which makes sense to me and is definitely one proven way of learning anything. As you used to hear from parents, how many times does it take for you to "learn your lesson" ? I'm wondering if bad habits have a similar connection ?

Here's a few more that came quick to the front of the memory buffer:

• Call your parents
  
• Back up your computer(s)
• Keep you weight forward (skiing)
• Fake a throw and go to the disk (ultimate)
• Always choose the first thing that sounds appetizing on a menu (however, this doesn't usually work for other purchases like clothes, home electronics etc)
  
• Do your homework early (kids and techies preparing for a demo)
• Lock your car
• You really don't need that last beer

I hope this provides some food for thought (and it is your first choice on the menu) !

Man, these kids are exciting (and a plethora of other sport links)

A few minutes ago, Team Canada won the World Junior Hockey Championship and last night, the Texas Longhorns won a thriller of over USC in NCAA's Rose Bowl. Two great games played with big hearts by young men.

I'd say Canada's win was a great example of team play, a few standouts (Justin Pogge), but team effort and heart won out. Quote of the game (just as Russia went down 3-0) - "that's the personification of embellishment".

The football game appeared a little different, with an incredible, standout performance by Vince Young. I love this guy - a similar non-traditional scrambler like Doug Flutie (ex Argo). BTW if you didn't hear about his drop kick last week or you're having trouble finding the replay, you can find it here.



It's a welcome change from pro-sports to watch younger athletes and amateurs play in big games, like these two examples. An old friend once said that he prefers watching college sports because it's more unpredictable, and I gotta agree.

But there's lots more to come over the next couple of months - the upcoming NCAA basketball Final Four and of course the Olympics (oh, and of course my son in goal for this Saturday's house league hockey game).

What a great start to a year in sports, if only England could put it all together for the World Cup.

Happier thoughts

I hope those last few posts weren't too much of a mood downer.

On a much brighter note, we just heard that our dear friends S&SH had a new baby boy early this morning. Congrats to the whole family and welcome to the big and beautiful world (yes, even with all the doom and gloom over the last little while, a can still truly say, it's beautiful).

Who would have thought that a nerdy and partygoing bunch of lads and lasses from the University of Waterloo would have such a bounty of children in a relatively short period of time (not to mention we amazingly found attractive and responsible spouses, and except for one couple, we're all still together).

My count is 22 children (ranging from a few hours old to 10 years old) from 11 UW alumni families.

Personally, two is just fine for me. We're in the great age between needy youngsters and horrible teenagers. Please, let me enjoy it for a few more years !

In the news

So many news stories, perspectives, statistics...

USA Today
The Toronto Sun

Older articles
CTV (on the Amon Beckles shooting)
University of Toronto article mid-year statistics

In memoriam

Yonge Street memorial for Jane Creba (15 years old)
I took this photo this morning, a block from my office

Amon Beckles (18 years old, killed Nov 18, 2005)

Guns. A sobering thought.

This is a new kind of post. A little troubling, but I wanted to make an entry while it's fresh.

Just watched Mr. & Mrs. Smith. If you don't know this movie, follow the link. I like the co-stars (actually, a little stronger than "like" for Ms. Jolie) and the movie's premise was fun. I kept reminding Suzanne throughout that it's a comedy and at the end I said "that was pretty entertaining". However, as this sunk in a little I'm thinking...all this gunplay, all this "fun" violence...how can I find this entertaining when we had another tragic gun death downtown Toronto just over a week ago.

I'm not codemning Hollywood or even the US gun thing (which many people are doing here), however I do find it a little disturbing that we are entertained by shows where many people are victims of guns on our TV and movie screens.

Neither do I think this is really anything new (perhaps there's a lot more of it and it's a lot more gratuitous), but the war and cowboys & indians themes have been ever present in our entertainment lives.

Is there a connection ? If so, what is it ? I don't have the answers, but it makes you wonder why we can easily except some poor schmuck being shot by Brad Pitt one minute and horrified at innocent victims of gang violence in our own cities the next !

I apologize if this comes off sounding kind of unemotional and unthoughtful, and I'm sure more thoughts on this topic will come in daylight hours. But I did wonder if this would spark any pjmixer blog heated commentary !